Our First Well Child Visit

I had Bebe on a Sunday afternoon, and I think our first well child visit was on Friday. I may not remember the day of the week, but I do remember the visit. We were at the doctors office a little early, and we waited for what seemed like an eternity. I fed her before we left the house, but I was nervous about making it back home for her next feeding. We had a fifteen minute drive to the doctors office, I was worried that I wouldn't be able to find the building,and we had been told that if we were not there ten minutes ahead of our appointment time we were late. We were there fifteen minutes early, and we had to wait another fifteen minutes past Bebe's scheduled appointment time before we were called back. So by the time we got into the office it had been about an hour since her last feeding, time was rapidly running out. A very nice nurse took us into a room, I changed Bebe into a clean dry diaper, and we headed to the scales. She weighed 6 lbs.,13 oz. I was very pleased with this not only had she stopped losing weight, she had gained an ounce! This had to be good news right?
We went back into the little room, and I happily wrapped Bebe in her blanket, and waited to met Bebe's Nurse practitioner. We waited, and waited, and waited. Finally Nurse H. walked through the door. She was a tiny little cute as a button woman. She had short curly hair, big blue eyes, and a lovely reassuring smile. I felt very comfortable around her. She looked directly at Bebe, and Said,"Hello Miss Bebe. I'm very happy to meet you. Look at you! Your just a beautiful little peanut!" Then it was my turn, she lovingly interrogated me for about twenty minutes, then she said, "We are having a big problem with this little girl. She isn't eating nearly enough, and if your accounts of her feedings are correct it is taking her way to long to eat. It should only take her five to ten minutes to drink a two ounce supplement. We need to speed that up, I'll get you guys a bunch of different sample nipples to try. The other problem is that you need to increase your milk supply. I see that you are drinking a lot of water already, and Kaysie's Mama, is she eating an extra 1000 calories each day?" My mother verified that I was. Then Nurse H. continued, "Alright, then it is time for a supplement for Kaysie. I want you to drink three cups of herbal fenugreek tea everyday. Also be sure that nothing disrupts Bebe's feeding routine." I was thinking to myself not even waiting an hour to get into see you at the doctors office, but I held my tongue. I did have to ask,"Isn't Bebe doing a little better since the home visit? She stopped losing weight, and she did gain an ounce." She answered me, "Oh yes, it is great that she has stopped losing weight, and I am very happy that she gained an ounce, but the problem is that she lost so much to begin with, and most children this age gain at least an ounce a day, and it has been two days since she was weighed last. Now normally I wouldn't need to see her for a month, but I would like you to bring her in at least twice a week for weight checks. You just drop by between 7:30 and 9:30 A.M., or 1:00 through 3:00 P.M. You don't make an appointment, you just show up, and we squeeze you in when other people are late. I would like you to come in next Monday, and Thursday. Then if possible bring her by on Saturday too." Now I had one more question, "How do I get her to eat faster." Nurse H. answered,"She might prefer a different nipple, but other than that I don't know I'm not an occupational therapist. Maybe you could show me how you are feeding her the supplement, and I could tell you how your supposed to feed her. It's almost feeding time why don't you try giving her the supplement first this time, and I will help you." I said that would be fine, but again I should have said no. I should have said, 'No. I don't want anything to disrupt her normal feeding schedule.' and left, but I didn't I fixed Bebe's two ounce supplement, and Nurse H. watched her drink, and gave me tips,"Try holding her upright a little more, pull back on the bottle, hold her closer to you, push her away, dangle her by her feet, flip her like a beach towel......." Alright so Nurse H. never said those last two, but you get the point it was exhausting, and none of her helpful hints were helpful. I had once more trusted someone else when I should have listened to the voice in my own head, and I had squandered yet another opportunity to breast feed my child. I felt like the stupidest woman on the planet. What could be easier than feeding a hungry baby? I didn't think that my child might be very hard to feed. I didn't think all these people that feed babies everyday can't feed my child either. I just thought if I can't even feed her enough or fast enough how am I going to handle the big stuff. I didn't realize that for Bebe, and me this was the big stuff.